Byrdhouse

My secret love affair with the Frosty Clementine

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  Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the fabU-lous, most delightful, Frosty Celementine.

(eh-hem, a round of applause here perhaps.)

This is the result of five years of research, study and intensive testing. Development and growth over this time, both formulaically and emotionally, contributed to this iteration, now release for public consumption.

There's a few secret variations I will share with you one day. For now, please give the basic recipe a chilly will good time: frostyclementine.com

Please note that a snowball is not crucial. Crushed ice works just as well as snow. (But I mean, WOW have you made the drink with a bona-fide snowball? omgbbq.) Also, only a few bartenders know the drink by name upon order. One is in Estes Park, Colorado, by the name of Terrance.

Top Ten Top Tens

These are the Top Ten reasons why I'll click on a link that has a Top Ten anything: 

1. Turns Out: I'm a reasonably intelligent person that loves pop culture. 
2. Paris Hilton (or not. pick your favorite celebretard and we'll go with that) 
3. Best Game Ever? Fight amongst yourselves. 
4. I Love Cracked. 
5. I Want to Bitch About How Their Top Ten Wasn't Knowledgeable Enough. (Welcome to the Club) 
6. Vh1 Has Brainwashed Me Into Oblivion. 
7. I Am Very Interested in That Field. 
8. I Have No Life. 
9. I Wanna See What's the Best. 
10. I Love the Mystique.

Why do I still have a slide projector and a minidisc player?

There have been many instances where I have thought of a fresh appropriation for something created years back on a different device like a tape deck or minidisk player. These bits of sound (or in some cases, images) never made the "technological jump" with the rest of my digital luggage. There they rested, locked into their own proprietary format, inable to be quickly realized in a new contex, only available on an abandoned device. One may choose to sell outdated equipment on ebay or donate them to a charity. Not me.

This got me to thinking how certain playback devices offer unique player-specific qualities. The cassette player adds an unexpected hiss to its recordings. The crackle of a scratched LP. The striped visual noise of a VCR whose tracking is a bit off. Likewise, there are recording-specific attributes, those that are encoded into the work at the time of the recording. Film does not look like video.

From wikipedia:

"The medium is the message" is a phrase coined by Marshall McLuhan meaning that the form of a medium embeds itself in the message, creating a symbiotic relationship by which the medium influences how the message is perceived, creating subtle change over time.

How might the media itself posses meaning regardless of the content it stores? Furthermore, should this understanding of media and their specific qualities belong in the communication designer's toolset? What if a movie that is set in the eighties is shot on a technology from that same time period, for instance on betamax?

In a recent exhibit at Art House in Castleberry Hill during LE FLASH, an artist displayed ephemera related to the Challenger explosion. The choice of slide projectors and 8mm film projectors added a layer of meaning that transgressed the content itself. It allowed you to see and experience the event as though you were in that 1986 elementary school classroom when the tragedy occurred.

Fashion Statement

I'm contributing work to Fashion Statement, an upcoming exhibition at Mary Stanley Studio in Castleberry Hill, Atlanta. Using Polaroid’s new portable technology my subject is the fashion choices of the people I see every day, my Armchair coworkers. Making a daily capture over the length of the show, October 2-24, I'll will be adding a new 2×3″ print each day. The final piece will be the culmination of the show duration. Join us during the Castleberry Hill Art Stroll on Oct 24th, 6-10pm. Mary Stanley Studio is on 211 Peters St. SW, Atlanta, GA 30313. Google Map it. Tel. 404.892.3211.

Today is Your Day Off

Hello Kev, it's June 15th, 2008. It's an otherwise normal Sunday aside from being your very first Father's Day. I'll admit that as I write this (reflecting as one does on such hallmark occasions), I'm astonished most by the fact that I've even made the time to write you. Other musings and pursuits have been on the front burner. I just want you to know a few things:

You now have a baby girl with Florrie, a fine woman who has held your hand for some six years now. She's walking in Candler Park today with your daughter Annabelle, Mom and Gigi. Though she was concerned with the burden of walking to the car with a stroller and a mammoth dog in tow, she didnt even quip when you intentionally did not volunteer to assist like you normally do in these instances. It's as if she's whispering, "be self-indulged today hon," by not saying anything at all.

And so you write and work on a summer CHIRP mix and think about how Annabelle is fast approaching three months. She's smiling, speaking mumblecore and getting fat thighs, and oh gawd do you love that.

There are several mini projects in various stages of development to mention.

You've started wrangling Flickr images tagged with "friedchicken" and/or "waffles." It's simply called Fried Chicken and Waffles. Your next step is to arrange this gallery into a limited edition hardback celebrating... well, you guessed it.

There's a 35mm E6 slide light casing you're working on too, inspired by Grayson's Slide Lamp. It's your first time experimenting with laser cut acrylic. 

The Monster Quest motion-sensing wilderness camera you got is still in test-mode. One day you hope to attach it to a fence and make a photography series on people picking up after their dogs. (Like I said, it's still in test-mode.)

Oh and that oil painting of Gigi for Annabelle's room; it's on its way. She is one stately explorer of the Alaskan tundra, just like you all dreamed. Do compare the image vs the painting:

You're working at Armchair, and you love it. 

OK the call just came. The ride is here to go to for brunch. 

Talk soon, 

Kevin

Towels and Cans of La Croix

“Towels and Cans of La Croix” For sale, by artist. Alternate view here. This is from the installation series self-indulgently entitled, "Things I gather in the floorboard of my car"

Note to Self

Anusol® is not the same thing as Anbesol®

Phonebook Phone Table

Click To Play

Schooner Names

Possible names for the sailboat you will likely never own:
1. Bloody Murder
2. Flash 2018
3. Mayonaise
4. Flamethrower
5. Vlad The Impaler

The sailing race competitors:
Osiris, Perseus, Gliss, Lady Goodgirl, Savvy, Parlay, Klosters, Georgia, Kaori, Maltese Falcon, Captain Earl, Moon Glow, Lone Ranger, Limitless, Gotcha (Too), Hyperion, Sojan, Highland Breeze, Whisper, Rebecca, Parsifal, Atlanta, Kokamo

Octopus Hands

In high school you branched off from your buddy's band and started your own solo act. You swore on 1700's French court attire (think Amadeus). Octopus tentacles instead of hands peeked from your coat's sleeves, as you tapped your Casio with such a focused intensity, completely oblivious to the mostly inaccurate notes the tentacled fingers produced. Your music was very hard to listen to, but your live shows were amazing to witness.

Smoking Policy

Are you a retailer who sells clothing of that distressed, dirty variety? Smoking Lounge™ is a new scented aerosol that smells just like your chain-smoking uncle. A single spray and any seemingly well-worn pair of jeans transforms into a round olfactory experience. Your customers will come to clammer after that 20th-century smoker aesthetic.

For the outdoor retailer we have Campfire Story™, a scent much as if you sat by a campfire last night, eating ramen noodles. Let those racks of hi-tech flannel-replacement shirts absorb it, like, well flannel. Buyers will be camping outside your store.

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The Spectrum Diet*

We are talking about a seven-day eating regime like no other that has marched across America, passed from mother to daughter, and is currently being tested by a large group of mildly overweight people. We are talking about the spectrum diet.

On Monday, we eat in red. Tomatoes, apples, tuna tartar, red peppers, pepperoni and raspberries. Tuesday is orange like cantaloupe and salmon. And well, oranges. Wednesday is yellow. Thursday, green. Friday is nothing but blueberries! Eggplant, plums and grapes are for Saturday. Sunday you fast. But maybe you do pink. (Florrie interjected and said to put in pink.) The real spectrum diet purest fasts though. I mean, come on, pink grapefruit and shrimp? Sheez.

*Working title, results may vary.

Briefbox / Boomcase

Larry Luk at Epidemik Coalition helped me create this briefbox. He screen printed me's illustration of an eighties blaster on an old briefcase I likes to carry rounds. Photos by John.